Thursday, September 6, 2012

i'm here. he's here.

Long, long ago, when Rudy and I had established our commitment to each other, we fell into a routine of planning our time together every Thursday evening. Both of us worked during the week, and lived in different areas of Southern California; so, we could only manage to hang out on the weekends. Every Thursday, Rudy would walk a block, or two, to a public phone booth, to call me so we could make plans.

Our relationship developed in this way for nine months, until we moved in together, and fully participated in each others daily lives, no longer needing to wait for the weekend to arrive for some together time.

Twenty-two years of marriage later, Rudy was offered a job in Honduras, his homeland, and after much discussion between us, he accepted. He would live, and work there, for a year. 

Even though I knew our decision was the right one, I felt panicked, while Rudy felt energized. On the one hand, I was worried about the possibility that our relationship would fall apart; yet, on the other hand I knew his moving was a destiny, for him, and for us. For whatever reason, this was meant to be part of our life story. Part of what makes our relationship the one it is. 

The kids and I would visit him, delving into his roots. We were given the opportunity to not just hear about, but to actually see, the places where he grew up. Rudy can now talk about his childhood, and we can visualized what and where he is talking about. Honestly, if he did not live there for a year, we may never have experienced something so important, and valuable for me, and especially for the kids. After the year ended, so did our long distant relationship. Rudy returned home.

Life resumed in California, as if Rudy had never been gone. Everything fell neatly back into place, as he embraced the role of stay-at-home dad. 

After several years, though, of not earning a wage, Rudy felt the need to return to his role as monetary provider. Therefore, when Arkansas offered him a job, and after an in-depth discussion, Rudy moved across the country to live and work. 

His contract is open-ended. There is no time frame for the duration of his stay. Somewhat nerve-wrecking, but also manageable. And even though, on occasion, we do question our lifestyle, we know that we are a couple who can go with the flow, and make the most of it.

Our whole life together, from back when we planned our weekends on a Thursday evening to our current situation, is our destiny. We are living the life we are supposed to be living. We don't force anything, and we don't wallow. Life is full of adventures. This is ours.

Today, right now, I'm here and so is Rudy. And that is what is important.